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Jon calls this "a work of genius"--and I had to pay him almost nothing for the blurb. More mystery and mayhem in the Ivy League, mixing my world with real history to create something entertaining.


I've combed my archives to create this collection of my magazine humor. From The Yale Record to The New Yorker, the best of the pre-Barry years is in here.


My first non-parodic novel is now available! It's school like it ought to be: loud, eventful, and full of swearing!


I'm probably going to Hell for this C.S. Lewis spoof.


The ultimate Harry Potter parody. Three novels, 25 foreign editions, over a million copies sold--it's too much to list here, but you can read excerpts and buy the books at Barrytrotter.com!

Tuesday, July 8, 2003

Great poem

Jon forwarded this poem to me, which I thought was just great. I hope you agree.

Reality Demands

By Wislawa Szymborska

Reality demands
that we also mention this:  
Life goes on.  
It continues at Cannae and Borodino,
at Kosovo Polje and Guernica.  

There's a gas station  
on a little square in Jericho,  
and wet paint  
on park benches in Bila Hora.  
Letters fly back and forth  
between Pearl Harbor and Hastings,  
a moving van passes    
beneath the eye of the lion at Cheronea,    
and the blooming orchards near Verdun  
cannot escape  
the approaching atmosphere front.  

There is so much Everything
that Nothing is hidden quite nicely.    
Music pours
from the yachts moored at Actium    
and couples dance on their sunlit decks.    

So much is always going on,
that it must be going on all over.  
Where not a stone still stands  
you see the Ice Cream Man  
besieged by children.  
Where Hiroshima had been    
Hiroshima is again,
producing many products
for everyday use.  

This terrifying world is not devoid of charms,  
of the mornings
that make waking up worthwhile.
The grass is green  
on Maciejowice's fields,    
and it is studded with dew,
as is normal with grass.    

Perhaps all fields are battlefields,    
all grounds are battlegrounds,  
those we remember  
and those that are forgotten:  
the birch, cedar, and fir forests, the white snow,  
the yellow sands, gray gravel, the iridescent swamps,  
the canyons of black defeat,    
where, in times of crisis,  
you can cower under a bush.

What moral flows from this? Probably none.  
Only the blood flows, drying quickly,  
and, as always, a few rivers, a few clouds.

On tragic mountain passes  
the wind rips hats from unwitting heads
and we can't help  
laughing at that.

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